You've gotta get it right, or the moment will slip right through your fingers. Let me give you an example: here I am sitting outside Sir John Clancy's auditorium, because i've missed the bus by mere moments, just because it arrived a few minutes earlier than scheduled. I literally saw it drive past, just as I was exiting Uni, but I thought to myself, no way, can't be?
Even scheduled things, have unexpected outcomes. You can never be too sure about something, although how accurate or fixed it may be. If we can't even depend on something that is meant to be fixed, how can we depend on things which are not fixed in nature?
One step forward, Two steps back.
Ever been stuck in limbo? With no idea what is going on, in an utter state of confusion? With no clue on which direction you're heading, it's like feeing your way in the dark. You can't see what's ahead of you, but you're merely feeling your way through, searching for a glimpse of light, just to find a way out.
It feels like fate is testing us. We’ve yet to have built anything for the fire to test, so how can we withstand the heat? Everyday, all around me, I see artworks, already painted, in fact, as I type this, one is right before my eyes, with the perfect backdrop of the Harbour Bridge and the Opera house. I constantly think to myself, “if only”. There are many “If-s” in the world I have questioned, but this has to be the biggest and greatest yet. I constantly speak as if I've got it all panned out, the future, the expectations, which I shouldn't at all. But I can't help it. It feels so right, yet so wrong. It feels like I'm walking on frozen ice, with every step, i'd feel accomplished of getting that far, but yet at any moment, I could fall right through down under into the great deep unknown.
Are we getting ahead of ourselves? Are we creating expectations for ourselves that we cannot fulfil? Are we walking into a trap? Are we digging our own graves? Are we making the wrong choices? We make plans that will never happen. We build a future that will never arrive. We create hope, that is only made to be destroyed.
How do you know if you've made the right choice? Let me rephrase that, the right decision. *no one should be made a choice, to be played with, to be hung by a thread, to be falsely lead, to be left with the ultimate fate of being hurt at the end of the day. We're all living in a world of uncertainty. But sometimes uncertainty won't do for some people, but yet some people love it, where they will be filled with surprises. It is really a wonder to find this balance, this satisfaction of just knowing enough but yet not too much. Like a bus. You know it'll come eventually, you just won't know when.
Being so far away, I don't know if I can do this. I can't see, I can't feel, I can't hear. I just want to be there beside him- physically present, to know that everything is going to be okay.
LAST MINUTE
I did the unthinkable and flew back for Kat's birthday. I should've booked in advanced, just like the rest did during SG50 sale period, where most tickets were 60% off!? But anyway, going back was pretty amazing as well. I've had one too many impromptu flight plans this year, and it was honestly pretty exhausting, especially just for 3 days. But I got a few moments of touch that nothing could ever replace, I got to spend Kat's birthday as a family with friends and cousins, and I got to have a good break (actually no, considering I had a Torts assignment due the following week). Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? Well don't. I've never stayed up for 39hours straight before, and the experience was pain to the full. Also, don't ever drink red bull. Not only does it taste like cough syrup, it makes you pee, alot. AND don't ever wait till the last minute to print your shit, cos yes, how typical and timely your printer dies on you in the last 30min of submission. Having a marathon to school within 30min is cray, and never again I'll say.
APPROACHING MID-SEM
It's already nearing the end of September, and just 3 months to go till Christmas. And I thought 2014 passed quickly, oh hell, I can't even remember what happened during the semester..
It's reading week now, and mid-sem break next week, and all these were placed for the sole purpose of letting students revise and catch up..but lol is that really gonna happen? heh I highly doubt. I know this but yet I do otherwise. Seriously, uni students. I really do have to work hard though. Before I can even look forward to December, I've got this hurdle to pass.
I pray for all the self-control, determination, and clarity of mind that I can muster, to get through the next 2 months. Oh, lord bless me.
Anyeong
Are we getting ahead of ourselves? Are we creating expectations for ourselves that we cannot fulfil? Are we walking into a trap? Are we digging our own graves? Are we making the wrong choices? We make plans that will never happen. We build a future that will never arrive. We create hope, that is only made to be destroyed.
How do you know if you've made the right choice? Let me rephrase that, the right decision. *no one should be made a choice, to be played with, to be hung by a thread, to be falsely lead, to be left with the ultimate fate of being hurt at the end of the day. We're all living in a world of uncertainty. But sometimes uncertainty won't do for some people, but yet some people love it, where they will be filled with surprises. It is really a wonder to find this balance, this satisfaction of just knowing enough but yet not too much. Like a bus. You know it'll come eventually, you just won't know when.
Being so far away, I don't know if I can do this. I can't see, I can't feel, I can't hear. I just want to be there beside him- physically present, to know that everything is going to be okay.
LAST MINUTE
I did the unthinkable and flew back for Kat's birthday. I should've booked in advanced, just like the rest did during SG50 sale period, where most tickets were 60% off!? But anyway, going back was pretty amazing as well. I've had one too many impromptu flight plans this year, and it was honestly pretty exhausting, especially just for 3 days. But I got a few moments of touch that nothing could ever replace, I got to spend Kat's birthday as a family with friends and cousins, and I got to have a good break (actually no, considering I had a Torts assignment due the following week). Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? Well don't. I've never stayed up for 39hours straight before, and the experience was pain to the full. Also, don't ever drink red bull. Not only does it taste like cough syrup, it makes you pee, alot. AND don't ever wait till the last minute to print your shit, cos yes, how typical and timely your printer dies on you in the last 30min of submission. Having a marathon to school within 30min is cray, and never again I'll say.
APPROACHING MID-SEM
It's already nearing the end of September, and just 3 months to go till Christmas. And I thought 2014 passed quickly, oh hell, I can't even remember what happened during the semester..
It's reading week now, and mid-sem break next week, and all these were placed for the sole purpose of letting students revise and catch up..but lol is that really gonna happen? heh I highly doubt. I know this but yet I do otherwise. Seriously, uni students. I really do have to work hard though. Before I can even look forward to December, I've got this hurdle to pass.
I pray for all the self-control, determination, and clarity of mind that I can muster, to get through the next 2 months. Oh, lord bless me.
Anyeong
It’s a beautiful night, we’re looking for something dumb to do.
