The way it used to be?

a month ago, i was just talking how O's were in 11 days, and freedom was in about a months' plus. And look how time has passed, how a month has just flew by, and here i am talking to you that O's are ending in just 2days.
Of course it was not an easy month. Days of worrying and stress and frustration from those other students who show off getting full marks in this and that. But then again, who are we to compare ourselves to them when we ourselves do not help ourselves and have some confidence. Confidence. Something most of us think we have but most of the time end up wrong. We lack that. However, some may have too much of it. Hah, its funny how this world works really.

This society we live in, makes me question life. Sungkyunkwan Scandal was one drama i was watching through the mid-break of Os. (hehe, hey we need a break too...then again i watched Flower Boy next door too..HAHA. and currently in the midst of watching The Greatest Love). But from all these 3 dramas, we learn something. Let me tell you something about Korean Dramas. They have one main specific target audience known as the female population. As we watch these, all those lovey dovey scenes of the main guy hero risking everything at all costs just to sweep the heroine off her feet, make our hearts flutter, raising our expectations of our future partners 1000000000x more higher.

But why do we watch these? Simple. To satisfy our desperate unrealistic fantasies of having a Prince Charming like that. It is only by watching these things that we get to experience this dire need, this selfish expectations that we have given ourselves and also the male population of upholding this bar, has make this whole society constantly demanding things that will only have a one in a million chance of happening.

Courtship, dating, whatever you may want to call it,
 is one tricky stage in a relationship don't you think? It's like that "stage" where you have to pass and its all clear and smooth sailing from then on. Kind of. That is what people think. No, please get that out of your heads. It is not a game. Dating is where a whole new world starts, the beginning of either something much greater, or on the other hand, the beginning of war. A simple behaviour like laughing when you fell down, will grow into something like leaving you in the lurch when you're at your worst in the future. Habits die hard. But over the rainbow, you see those- he picks you up when you have fallen, and this habit will just grow to something like staying by your side and supporting you through your hardest times.

Marriage.
Don't take it lightly. As the words at the alter echo, "stand beside you through thick and thin, through good and bad, through joy and sorrow." Why do people say these if they don't keep to it?
Formality they may say. But why don't people take these seriously? I just don't understand. Greed. Hatred. Pride. I'm scared of this world. Scared that I won't be strong enough for whatever that may be thrown at me. Scared that i may fall into the same pit that she has fallen. Scared that i won't have the strength to get up on my own, out of that pit. Scared to fall again, to be hurt again. But what can we do? Carry on living that is.

The future holds a series of wonders, a series of darkeness. There won't be best of both worlds, you'd just better give and take, and make-do with what you have, and appreciate the little things. Taking things for granted aye? It won't last. When that thing is gone, you won't get it back, ever. So hold on tight my friend, hold on tight, or you may regret it and suffer the consequences later.

Poverty.
Why do people steal? Why do people cheat? Why do people lie? Desperation.
We may detests robbers, cheaters and liars. But then again what is their story? What if we were put into their shoes? I've come to realise that the third world countries are being forced into the corner, where they have no choice but to work in those poor conditions that they are given, paid peanuts, but yet expected to abide by the laws and rules? How are they going to feed their families? themselves? With those peanuts they are being paid, they are forced to steal, forced to cheat, forced to lie. Yes they can try breaking out of that poverty cycle and helping themselves by working hard, working hard to earn their own living.
But without the support of anyone, without the courage, and in that kind of environment and in this society, it is nearly impossible. Hence, those born with a silver spoon in your mouth, don't take everything for granted. Don't just spend wastefully, for you are given a chance to make a difference, a chance to do something to change this. The riches have become selfish, and the poor has become selfless. Shouldn't it be the reverse?
But what can we do. This cycle where we have to upkeep ourselves, our image, to have supporters and fans, to make ourselves feel better, to build our name to fame, we need money. All the values are all linked one way or another, with the dirtiest thing on this earth. Greed and money.
But i'm not saying all robbers cheaters and liars are good people. Some are just plain lazy and have a rubbish attitude on life. So they deserve it. I'm just saying, before judging, give people a chance. But others who are willing to work hard but are not given the opportunity.
Then again, the good and the bad are distinguish-ably hard to separate because of facades built up over time, to survive in this cruel world.

This world. This society. How?


I am lucky to be born into a family that is able to support me to live comfortably, with only the worries of scoring well in exams and competitions. What about others?
So live each day like it is your last. Don't look down on others, for that could be you too. We don't know what will happen after we die. What if you end up in a horrible place?

Be thankful. I am, but i hope for everyone to find that strength to help ourselves to stand up after we have fallen, find that courage to hold on to what we believe in, find that wisdom to choose the right from wrong, find that idea that will change this world to be a better one.

To the last 2 days of O's, i wish everyone the best. and to those who have finished today, well...haha well on you!

Anyeong!

The way it used to be, when life was simple, and the only apples we had to care were the ones growing on trees, and the only blackberries were the poisonous ones in the bushes found in the nearby forests and when the only form of communication was letters and telegrams and smoke calls. I can't say i hate the globalisation and industrialisation that has happened throughout the century. But what if we were living like the past? What if.

11 days.

It's currently 1222...

and my eyes can barely stay open.
So here i am just to say hello, and goodbye.

(That sounds like a legit poem.)

HAHA.
okay, so anyway good luck to all people who are suffering with us, we shall pull through this together.

and in the meantime, i needa sleep. thanks. HAHAHA. #brainnotfunctioning





goodnight, anyeong.
me eggcited to sleep teehee.

Everything happens for a reason. So don't be sad yeah? (: you're not alone.

11days to Os...1 month 5 days to freedom. 2 more days till graduation. Once an MGirl, always an MGirl.

All you need is love.

So, I saw him yesterday. And poof, it made my day.
People said I was lame; they said I was wasting my time; they said I was a fool.
A fool yet again, but I was happy, happy to have that feeling again. You have no idea.
I can't fully describe it, that simple wave.
The down side, I WASN'T WEARING MY DAM SPECS. SO HELL I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING CLEARLY.
Haha, even so i could make out your silhouette babe. Anywhere, anytime. LOL. Okay joking, if you didn't walk past the library and had that surprised-shocked-longtimenosee expression and body language, I wouldn't have looked up. And I thank you for that.

PS. if anyone is actually reading this. hai, nice to meet you, please don't judge me. HAHA.

Then again, I have to push past all these. I've came to a conclusion a long time ago that he's just a "if-i don't see you, i'll forget about you soon enough".
That is why just the slight glimpse of you could bring back all those feelings I've took so long to put at the back of my head, locked in some treasure box with a key thrown into my deep sea of thoughts.

Don't be a fool they said. I won't be. But hey, can't a girl just be happy with her imagination?

Thank you to drey, who HAHA-ed me for a full minute; the 2 pervs for not bothering; and the long lost wei loong who gave constructive feedback and advise. HAHA.
 ___________________________________

Putting emotions aside,
whatsup people! It's the Sept Holidays! And its ending real soon ),:
O's in about 6weeks plus?
WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE. These 4 weeks are gonna be real painful. I just know it, but what am i doing. Seriously?

SO ANYWAY,
yesterday was the most disturbing and frustrating journey to the club ever.
Firstly, the mrt ride- this guy with a group of girl friends sat beside me. I assume he just finished CCA or maybe he just sweat a lot and have really bad BO. AND IM LIKE DUDE? so here i am trying to lean as far away as i can from the dude, and drop hints that he stink, hoping that he would get off the next stop. Nope, had to suffer 90% of the journey.
then, after getting off the mrt, i exit the station on the wrong side, hence having to walk abit further crossing the road. So as i approach the traffic light, there is no button to press to cross the road?! so i'm like, what do i do. I ended up crossing to the other side, away, from the bus stop, and then crossing another 2 traffic lights to get to the bus stop. AS i was crossing, that no-button traffic light turned green man. LIKE WHAT EVEN?! Haiz, nevermind. exercise.

To all those feeling down, here's some inspiration.
Her positivity inspires me. AND IT SHALL INSPIRE YOU TOO.

 anyeong, 사랑해

Dignitas.

OKAY OKAY I AM LIKE A DAY LATE BUT AHH.
ITS A "HAVE TO" TO POST EVERY MONTH OKAY!?

 So anyway, whatsup. Prelims have just ended about a week ago, and it was a long tough struggle, like a long drought. Lo and behold. failed 3 subjects LOL. but, improved on the rest, SO i still did better than Mid Years, where i only failed 1 subject. HAHA. ironic no?

Sometimes, i question life. I'm the sort of person that don't follow theories or go by the books. If they say earth is round, earth is round. These basics i would have to agree without question. But it's those sweeping statements that make me think. Think hard. There are no other living matter other than earth they may say. That i beg to differ. We live on earth, found in one of a million galaxies called The Milky Way. Somehow i imagine ourselves to be caught in a snow globe, where there is something much greater out there, looking in on us. Just like how we look at ants, or how we look at micro organisms under a microscope. There are just infinite things in our universe that have yet to be discovered. In a far away planet many thousand miles away, there could be some organism whatever they may be, also thinking the same thing as me, about different existence of different species on other planets that are undiscovered. Yet in a single lifetime, it is impossible to find out about everything. Maybe that is why some people believe in reincarnation. Those people who cannot finish living in just one lifetime. A cat has nine lives. Maybe they are the ones who are able to know more than anyone else.

Why so emotional and deep you may ask?
I've just finished one of the most amazing books ever. Not one of those fan fiction werewolves vampires series.
Me Before You- Jojo Moyes
Please go check it out? I'm still so breathless after reading it. Like most stories we read now is all lovely flowers and dasies. But hey babe, sorry to burst your bubble, life aint no bed of roses.
Dignitas; A place where people assist those who choose to die.

There are rights. Human rights.
Live with dignity;
Die with dignity.

“I told him a story of two people. Two people who shouldn’t have met, and who didn’t like each other much when they did, but who found they were the only two people in the world who could possibly have understood each other.”

“I will never, ever regret the things I’ve done. Because most days, all you have are places in your memory that you can go to.”

-JoJo Moyes, Me Before You

Anyeong!

Right round.

TODAY IS THE LAST DAY OF JULY AND I NEARLY FORGOT TO UPDATE THIS MONTH WHOOP. SAVED AT THE LAST MINUTE.

so, whatsup to the souls out there who still care to look at this. HAHA.
2 days to Eng prelims, and 12 to the rest of the papers. Screwed or screwed?
and NEVER GO ON THE COM. cos this happens. THIS RIGHT HERE. my time slips away like trying to hold water in your hands.

I feel like i can do this. i can. i have to. and i will. AAAH FIGHTING!

FOUNDERS DAY.
YAAAY CONVINCED MUMMY TO CURL MY HAIR. last minute checking of prices was hilarious tho. i did not have any shop in mind but..the internet is pretty useful.. first one i called $45 HAHA and guess how much i got mine for? $12.80 yo! so yup had fun camwhoring and stuff and our cup song item as a sec 4 cohord. oh right, "cohort". i just googled that to search for the correct spelling LOL. AND ENGLISH IS IN 2 DAYS TIME HAHA.
Oh, Marissa wore the same dress as me. well not exactly the same. like similar. I was perfectly find with it. BUT SHE GAVE ME THE WTH LOOK. but aiya whatever haha.

3 DAYS AGO, SUNDAY
impromptu road trip to JB LOL! went to watch Wolverine! tho i'm super confused about the show cos i don't exactly follow the series? But it was a great catch up with the cuzzies; Desiree, Tashia, Gavin. The movie tickets are so much cheaper there btw, 5.80 approx. HAHA. while just across the causeway its twice the price. But then again, they blanked out the intimate scenes. so.... LOL. stupid skip of scenes disrupted the flow...




Anyway, its 9.59 and i REALLY should get back to work. heh. okay tata (:

anyong!

Find someone who loves you more than you love him.

Half a year left.

Its June, coming to July. Half a year gone? Or half a year left?

3 DAYS AGO, ITS BEEN 4 YEARS SINCE I STARTED THIS BLOG WHOOP!
Blogspot, what an old "leychey" complicated blog forum some may say, but after 4 years i'm still here aren't i? Although i've got my tumblr, i won't leave blogspot.

1. my archives is looking sexier than ever at the side >>>
2. its where all of us in this '97 and earlier batches started off, where we use to stalk our senior's blog and just go to random blogs ("bloghopping")

And this post shall be dedicated to nik (HI NIK IF YOU ARE READING THIS, HOW DO YOU DO?) since she reminded me that blogging still exists. and that there's such thing if you blog well or not. obviously i don't cos mine is not sentimental enough LOL. mine is just..summarized. too summarized. Only when i'm feeling emotionally detached or when it's time to make new year resolutions, that is when i can really type a whole bunch of rubbish haha.

So its been a long while since i've hit the pool. Sometimes i'm too lazy, sometimes i just don't feel like it?
i should start one day. Gym is neither here nor there. i hit the gym only on Sundays, so it aint that spectacular.

TODAY
i did the wrong piece of homework. i am so annoyed with myself i cannot even.
ah so anyway i decided to screw it. and right now its 1040, so i've allocated the next 3h to finishing my geog paper 2 which i REALLY do not wanna do.
This holiday felt neither here nor there. Like i feel like i did a hell of crap but when i look back, its as if i did nothing. Ever get that feeling?
If you were to ask me if i had any lessons or takeaways, i really don't really know how to answer you.
I'll think about it, and post it some other day...

MY DREAM
did i say i have a dream journal? oh well i shall repeat it again. i do. HAHAHA. and i'm having problem recording all the dreams down. Cos' i would scribble them on a rough piece of paper and add to the already-existent pile, and i never seem to finish copying over. well, one day.

In the meantime, lets hope that water running in mummy and daddy's room can be stopped soon, or else ALOT of water will be wasted and the house may be flooded by morning. haha.

anyeong!
<3 p="">Am i still uncertain about this?

Silver lining;

"I'm not a person who cannot hear, but a person who sees well;"




Can You Hear My Heart is such a complicated drama i tell you..

ANYWAY GUESS, WHAT..
SCHOOL IS CANCELLED NEXT WEEK DUE TO THE HAZE!!?!?!?!
the haze went up all the way to PSI:401
that is one crazy digit.
buildings all covered, masks all sold out...

everyone take care!

so in the meantime, i guess we have to make good use of this time =/ who knows if SPA and Olevels Chi oral will be postponed?

AND AND GUESS WHAT. MY KITTY KAT IS ATTACHEDD!!!hahhaa ok i dunno whats the difference between "seeing someone/dating" VS "official" so...

Don't always see the negative side to things. Sometimes it'll only bring you down further.
Search for the silver lining around your black cloud. Its there, you've just gotta look harder.

anyeong~ !