Proud to be.

I went with my gut, I gave in, but who ever said giving in to what your heart wants would be a bad thing? I live in this temporary bliss.




I HAVE FINALS TOMORROW AND LIKE WTF AM I DOING BLOGGING? Well let me tell you why, it's because of the bloody construction going on 2 levels above, and yes even through such thickness I can still hear the prominent drilling and knocking FOR THE PAST 2 FKING MONTHS. LIKE BITCH WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU BUILDING, THE TAJ MAHAL?! OR THE GREAT WALL OF CHINA?!?!

Okay, I really try to calm down and be all civil about it..but c'mon 1 week or so i'm good. But my patience can only hold on for so long.. and 2 months of constant drilling starting from 845 is PURE TORTURE. It got so bad that last night when I was heading to bed at 245, I actually thought of staying up to study till 845, so I can have peace, and just get some sleep when the drilling starts.

Enough of drilling, what I need to do is get some information drilled into my head instead. I'm at this point where I'm reading, studying, but i'm not exactly sure if anything is going through?

SEAGAMES 2015
Oh my lord, I wasn't suppose to follow the Games so closely this year such that i'll know who won what, BUT IT WAS AMAZING. Swimming was harvesting the Golds day in day out, hitting our 50th Gold for SG%) just 2 days ago by Tao Li, and getting our 51st by Zheng Wen. And omg don't even get me started on the Women 4x200m Free Relay. I nearly died watching- we were losing by like 5m (+1.56) even till the last 200m, but Ting Wen caught up in the last 50m. LIKE THE LAST FRICKIN LAP. Now I don't know what you wanna call last minute, but that was literally the last torturous minute of my life. Even with the time difference and distance, thanks to the advancement of technology called Youtube Live streaming, I got to feel the excitement in the comfort of my own room. But you could imagine if I was feeling that alone as 1 person, what more to be with your team in a stadium filled with thousands of people screaming their heads off cheering team SG on.



And more often than enough, I only get inspired by people I know personally; could be a close friend, a childhood buddy, a talented relative or something, but after watching that race, it was my first time being super inspired by someone I did not know personally: Ting Wen. To have felt that inspiration even through a computer screen, it was really overwhelming. It was to the point that I even felt inspired to return to swimming LOL. I don't know, but to have so many friends participating in the Games this year, really made me want to be part of the whole seagames fananza.

Half way through the prize ceremony, the sound system died, and though there was an awkward silence for 5s, the crowd started singing the national anthem acapella. It was amazing, to the point that I was so proud to be a Singaporean?! The feels I tell you. (@ 4:58)



FINALS
now let the real games begin. I really don't know how i'm gonna survive this, but I have to right? Just 3 weeks. 3 more weeks till freedom. I can do this omg. My lack of confidence these few weeks is really getting to me. But I still feel super lost? But yesterday I went through my calling spree, and it was really much needed laughter. Be it 1min, 5min, 30min or even 2h, THANK YOU GUYS FOR MAKING MY NIGHT. May have wasted time, time I could've spent sleeping, or studying, but it was time worth wasting.

DEPENDENCY
How do you depend on someone? How do you know you can depend on them? Reassurance?

anyeong! (:
This glimmer of hope I hold onto, is it temporary? Or forever?